You would have heard of Super star,Rockstar,ultimate star,sharan :p.... Its time to Know about Tamil Nadu's Flopstar !!! ;)

After a string of super hit movies, my friends and I always have a topic at hand to while away some time which incidentally is my topic here too...

It’s about Dr.Vijay SSLC Fail. No more introductions needed I guess.

After seeing most of his movies, one can very easily guess what it will be like. So I have decided to go out guessing that for his new movie sura and his forth coming projects (eh… projects? No comments).

Prelude to the movie...

1. His 50th Movie sura, is incidentally also his 50th movie with the same old crap story(If you happen to find anything related to the word story, Do buzz me)

2. Few changes you can find in his movies are Director, Music director, of course the Heroine and the rest of the cast.

3. How can we forget his dance moves for it is the only thing which is watch able.

4. The hero may be a car/bike mechanic, Fisherman, Mama, you name it we have it kinda role, still the heroine would fall heads over heels for the hero!!

5. The heroine appears out of no where and disappears.

6. The heroine falls for the hero in the first sight.

7. The heroine is always 15.8 times richer than the hero!!

8. The hero can bash up to N number of villains in a go.
(Where N is always > 20)

9. Once airborne he can attack 20 persons before his foot touches the ground (No Not the swine flu virus, But Our hero!!!)

10. Not to forget the hero either has a huge family or no family. If he has a family they will come in parts at will.

11. Punch Dialogues Galore!!! (I can go about and write a separate post on this so let’s avoid this for the time being)

Now let’s get to how his movie will be part…

As you go in and get to your seats you see the ad's of popular medicine brands like Crocin, Anacin, bla bla they have started to sponsor the ad's for Vijay movies, for he is also one reason why they are still in the market!!!

The movie starts with a big shot producer's name being put on the screen,(After the release he would be in the streets no doubt about that). Title, nobody really cares about it... Its going to be something funny anyway.

*Hero Intro...
The movie usually starts with a fight/song.
The hero can fly, yes you read it right. FLY (references - Kuruvi, Villu. Haven't watched sura and vettaikaran will not do so)

If it’s a fight Read 9

Usually it’s a fight followed by a song.

Irrespective of the story line, the hero will look like a beggar (sorry, not intended to hurt beggars)

Mood of the audience: Excited. (Not because of the movie entirely, but coz of the A/c that too it’s summer)

*Now let’s meet the heroine, err the hero meeting the heroine.

No matter who the heroine is, they manage to show her with one bloody coat of make up and the heroine looks yuck!!!(Villu, kuruvi and many more sonna solli kitte irukkalam)

Read 5 and 6

*Song- yes song love at first sight or may be they don't even look but its love...

It’s supposed to be a romantic song; the song will be playing in the background. You’ll never see the hero open his mouth to sing/imitate the voice!!! Great Talent acquired Indeed!!

Mood of the Audience: Lets get some popcorn!!

*Villain Intro...
As we have a hero, we need a villain... here comes our villain. You can very easily guess even with you eyes closed that it’s the villain coming after the scene above.

*you guessed it right... there's fight!!! Read 11, 8, 9

*Well there was a fight; the hero's got something to cheer about!!! Time for a song!!!
Immediately after the song the hero finds that the villain is the biggest big shot in the town OMG I would pee in my pants seeing the villain kind of villain!!!

Mood of the audience:
Vijay fans "Adra sakka"
General Audience "podra Mokka"

*Now here is the part where the villains starts to trouble the hero's family/Friends/somebody.
No matter how many people are around the villain, he chooses to harm the ones dear to our hero.

You can expect to see our hero's eye go red, redder, reddest, darkest reddest. Yes that’s the max.

INTERVAL!!!
Mood of the audience: Very Relaxed!! It’s the interval the best part in vijay movies!!!

*Time for a fight... Don ask me why.
Read 11, 8, and 9.

*After a fight there has to be a song. Come on after all it’s a vijay movie what can you expect to see.
Song for no reason. You don't actually have a choice. Watch it, I mean bear it.

Read 5, 3

*add one more scene,
At this point of time you know, you have already watched enough of crap!! This scene will be more or less of the same sort!!! Eat this too!!!

*Song
You might have seen some new dance steps with some crappy music, now time for some more new dance steps with some more crappy songs!!!
Well this song will be for no reason, may be you can refill your pop corn!!! And get some coke!! Well now you have a reason

Read 5, 3

Mood of the audience: "Unnala evlo mudiyumnu naanum paakuren da"


*Climax Fight
Read 11, 8, and 9.
The Villain gets to die no matter who he is!!! He may be the biggest of all the big shot, He gets to die. I’m sorry dude your part is over kind of death.


*What next the villain is dead Its the time for the Happily ever after scene. Read 5, 10. Wait I guess its better to have a song here... Oh come on... it’s a vijay movie!!!

Oh yes the lead pair unite!! Don’t ask me how and why.

Everyone in the screen is happy very kappy!!! Yay!!!
Not a single person in the audience has a conscious mind!!! Most of them would be brain dead or Brain F’ed!!

Some latest Developments

It is believed that Dr.Vijay uses stunts that he learnt from
"Captains School of stuntography"

Read 8, 9

The lyrics as I hear is to be given heads up by the hero, they are very funny I would put that next to the stunts!!

Vijay Movies are also stared at by ajith fans, so that they can console themselves saying "Someone to give company to our thala"

One word which you can never relate to his movies - "L for Logic"

Apart from movies Dr.Vijay also renders some help to the society as well as the Indian Army. Let’s see how...

VIJAY HELPS KIDS GROW FASTER.

Yes the above statement is true... Its not complan or boost or whatever... It’s our One and Only Vijay.

Mom: Chellam Olunga Saapidu...
Kid: No Mom I'm not hungry...
Mom: Ippo nee sapdraya illa naa vijay padam podava??
Kid gives an I’m already dead look and starts eating...

HOW VIJAY HELPS THE INDIAN ARMY

Of late there has been news that infiltrators form pakistan has been reduced to ZERO!!!
No one form any terrorist organization is ready to step into India.
We sneaked in to find out what has happened....
The Indian Army is following a new method of punishment, where in the caught terrorist is being made to watch Dr.Vijay's movies and after a day or two of continuous Dr.vijay movies he will be sent back to where he came from just to tell his fellow terrorist what kind of punishment is being given here !!! Now you know!!!

Well I and few of my friends have this doubt

"How many times will Dr.Vijay watch his own Movies?" or will he at least watch it??

And now finally... A big, No huge huge... Huge thanks to Dr.vijay for he never tried to speak in English in any of his movies!!! OMG!!! Did I just give him an idea? :p

Well now I’m more or less Brain F’ed… I jus can’t give a proper ending here… that’s it fellas!!! Phew!!!